4. fish: check-ins & chatter.

The aftermath of that fateful Friday, the first official o-fish-al date with my little tuna was interesting in that he was leaving almost immediately for a week in the Dominican Republic which was going to force a nice little chunk of time out of touch, allowing us to reflect on our own, or so I thought. The format for this part of the tale is best told with the days of the week in mind – bearing in mind I was working a full week plus overtime while fish got blubbered poolside at a resort in the Dominican Republic.

Saturday, the day after our first date, I was out of town on a day trip to visit a girlfriend in the city a few hours away, something I had told fish several ties. I came home after dinner to join a pub crawl with friends. Fish texted me sporadically throughout the day, ending with “if ur ever bored the doors open”. This happens semi-frequently – fish will know I have plans and he will suggest I rearrange them to see him – and yet he hasn’t offered up the same kind of commitment to wanting to see me.

Sunday fish was in his packing mode and getting ready to tuck into bed early for his flight. I had been out shopping and made a gentle suggestion we could meet up for coffee at Starbucks – but the timing didn’t really work out – plus he didn’t want to have any caffeine (weak excuse or weak man?) We texted about his trip to Punta Cana and he said to me that he would “miss ya a tad though!!” Unintentionally (but maybe sub-consciously) I responded like a meme of a girl who’s shlubbing him off: “Aw … thats niceeeeee (6 e’s oof). When you’re back we’ll get togeth. Brew up some good stories to tell me!” He assured me he planned on forgetting most of what he did for the week by way of getting blackout drunk.

Monday morning, from the airport, he sent me a photo of the Starbucks sign (my favourite, he’s a Tim Hortons loyalist) asking what to order. By the time I saw it he had boarded his flight and I assumed, was out of touch, until …

Wednesday morning as I sat at my desk my phone dinged and I was surprised to see fish’s name. He was texting to let me know he was “2/2 for blackouts and had lost a pair of Oakleys”. I asked if he was having fun and suggested the silver lining was getting to shop for new sunglasses when he came home. “Lets make it a date. ;)” he said. “Obviously.” I agreed.

Friday morning I woke up to a drunk text from the wee hours of the morning. When I replied a conversation occurred that I think succinctly summarizes how fish and I are. You’ll see him say anything and me ignore everything. When I said in the first fish post, I’ve been flopping on his fish deck forever – this is his flip and my flop. Please enjoy:

Fish: Prettty babe.
Me: 😘 when are you back?
Fish: Monday
Me: 🙂
Fish: I wish we were cuddling right now.
Me: Same. … Just grabbed my coffee and heading to work. I work all weekend too.”
Fish: Horrible! And im just super horny. I wish I had a pic at least
Me: Haaaaaaaaaaa
… nonsense texting about my weekend at work …
Fish: I woulda delivered food and kisses for sure
Me: We get double time in lieu. I need to book more holidays. You hate it there right? You’re coming back early?
Fish: Yes you should. Book us a retreat to New York or Niagara. But u do make me miss home a little. not home but u. u made me crush on you. 😊
Me: Oh pffffffffff
Fish: We shoulda hung out aftttter my trip. damn mimi keeps popping in my head.
Me: You said before.
Fish: Mistake by me I guess.
… nonsense texting about how much sunscreen he was using and beach day plans …
Fish: When do you wanna spare some time with me next week. Or we booking that weekend gettaway
Me: Any day. Whatever you wanna do. Things and stuff.
Fish: I just wanna spend time with u
Me: Whenever you want I’m avail.
Fish: Okay great! :):):) Fishing was sweet yesterday Got a barracuda mahi mahi and tuna

Over the remaining time of his trip we texted randomly, usually in the morning after he’d had breakfast before he went to the pool. He was alaways nursing an upset stomach or hangover – and he’d occasionally talk about how he wanted to “touch himself”. He’d suggest next trip he wanted me there with him so he wasn’t rooming with his brothers – which made being horny difficult. He’d also text me after dinner shows and before he went to the nightclubs or to bed. One night he decided to tell me about how his really good friend is a girl, and I told him, unwitting of the implication, that a lot of my friends are dudes. He sent me a photo of him and his best girl friend, he suggested I should come with him to her birthday party the following weekend, and that I should be his wedding date for her wedding in 2020. I ignored all of that and I told fish I don’t typically take photos with my dude friends. He said he liked photos of just me better anyway. Well yea, duh, sometimes the internet gifts us with irrefutable truths. And this next thing is something I’ve come to learn is irrefutable. Ladies – guys you’re “talking to” will assume you’re banging your guy friends, so just keep that shit under wraps especially if, like me, you are in fact banging your guy friends. (I can’t wait to write the blogs about one of my best friends – a guy who nicknamed himself LB – its short for little bitch. We lowkey ruin each others lives – it’s a good time.

Saturday and Sunday came around – I was working. Fish and I continued to text throughout the remainder of his vacation. I told him to write my name in a heart in the sand. He asked me if it would “get me under the sheets quicker.” I said “Ha. I guess you’ll find out.” I didn’t love this text – I thought it was a little disrespectful. But also – I remind myself that not every guy I meet, talk to or sleep with is going to be a romantic interest and I would be annoyed if a dude held it against me if I wasn’t wanting to commit – but liked them enough to carry on casually. So I resolved myself to be ok with the direction it felt like fish and I were going. From the mall, later Sunday afternoon I texted him a photo of luggage and said “You can buy me these for our trip.” He suggested New York again – I suggested Ireland – he told me to start smaller – I said why even leave town then – and he said “you won’t be needing that suitcase then.” That made me laugh – I told him regardless of that – he got brownie points for not tossing out the idea altogether. He was finally coming home after a week of drunk check-ins and chatting. Late Sunday night fish sent me one last slightly-sloppy sweet nothing:

Fish: The staff here say “U had very many beer” to me
Me: You’re an impressive drinker
Fish: We can become drink friends/lovers
Me: Mmhmm?
Fish: Fine we wont, just lovers
Me: We’re friends already I think. And I don’t need to be drunk to chill with you?
Fish: U sure don’t. I like the way you operate
Me: Mmhmm?
Fish: U talk walk and perform well

I didn’t reply to that last message because – well I don’t know why for sure, other than I had instincts, rightly or wrongly, that fish did not want to be caught, at least not right now, but more specifically not by me. And because of that I was only going in with one foot – I decidedly didn’t care what he meant by my talking, walking, and performing well. But luckily for the sake of the story, fish is persistent in his efforts to reel me in, so in the next blog those “free tix” for the movies will make a reappearance, he says “ps I love you” and we’ll go on a second date.


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